Punky

[Published in Saccade]

DANGERVILLE ANNUAL CARNIVAL

Punky peered at the sign, but she couldn't read it. The letters were just strange markings to her. She never could take to learning how to read.
"Just take a look at little Punky!" Vinny Henderson called, surrounded by a bunch of friends, all of them laughing at her. "All gussied up like an alley cat! What's up, retard? Think you're gonna score, do ya?"
That was unlikely to happen, because Punky wasn't known for her good looks. Quite the opposite in fact, most folks referring to her as darn ugly.
"You all by your lonesome, Punky?" Vinny continued. "Where's Daddy today? Too busy playing with Jack Daniels?"
"Daddy couldn't make it."
"He didn't wanna be seen with his retard's the truth!" shouted Vinny for all to hear. Then he and his friends disappeared into the crowd, leaving her alone once again.
She wished Daddy could have been there, with her all tuckered up in her summer dress. She recalled his reply when she had asked him to go with her to the carnival.
"Punky, you're so damn ugly, you ain't never gonna have a life!"
Cruel words, but Punky didn't care, she was way past that. For sixteen years Daddy had blamed her for Mama's death. In labour all that time, with Punky refusing to come out, it was no wonder it had taken its toll on the poor woman.
"If it hadn't been for you Mama would still be here today!"
Cruel words indeed.
Vinny and his bunch were outside the ghost train. They were all boys together, clowns from high school. Punky noticed that Jack was with them, the new kid in town. "He's so cute," she thought, but she stood no chance with him, not with her gruesome features.
"Complications with the birth," the doctor had explained to Daddy, "there seems to be some facial defects."
Punky tagged along with Vinny's group, keeping a safe distance behind. She didn't intend to embarrass them, Heaven forbid. She could hear the thumping sound of some unrecognizable rock number, together with the shrill screams of pleasure from the rides all around her. The strong scents of hot dogs and burgers filled the night air, and moving lights and colours created a kaleidoscope of excitement and enjoyment.
She wanted Daddy to be there, even though she was peeved that he had refused to come. She had always loved him in her own way, but after sixteen years of torment from him it was becoming increasingly hard.
A small kid with some candy floss the colour of Pepto Bismol was staring at her face. She was used to it, people astonished by her facial imperfection. She was surprised at the number of people who had turned out for the event, it appeared as though the whole town was there. Except for Daddy.
She wanted to scream out to the world. "It ain't my fault I'm like this! The Lord made me this way. I've a heart a-beating inside, just like anyone else." Yet she felt that no-one would listen. They could only see her face, a wretched sight.
"Hey, looky here!" yelled Vinny. They had reached one of the show tents, and he was pointing at the sign displayed beside the entrance.

THE UGLIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD

Of course, Punky was unable to read it, but she had seen the sketch that accompanied the sign, so she realized the nature of the attraction. She was certain that she spied Jack looking her way, just for a moment, but it was enough.
"Let's get in here, guys," said Vinny, urging his colleagues to enter the tent, "I just gotta see this."
There was a small fat man outside the tent, encouraging people to enter and view the show. "A genuine freak of nature, folks," he cried. "Just a dollar a head."
"D'ya hear that? A freak of nature!" bellowed Vinny, as the boys produced their dollars and disappeared into the tent.
Jack glanced back just before entering, caught Punky's eye. She just had to follow, freak or no freak, no-one could be as ugly as she was. She grabbed a dollar from inside her dress pocket, and approached the fat man. His eyes were upon her immediately, she could practically feel them, drilling into her like a jackhammer. He accepted her payment, and allowed her to pass. Once inside, she heard him calling. "A genuine freak of nature!" He could have been referring to her.
Vinny's group and some other people were huddled together before a small podium, awaiting the appearance of the freak. The inside of the tent was only small, and there were spotlights on each side of the stage. Punky joined the crowd, lingering at the back of the group, barely able to see what was happening. Then she heard a voice.
"Ladies and gentlemen." It was another fat man, a taller one this time. "Thank you for joining us today. Now let me warn you, this freak of nature will astound you. Our claims are entirely true. Becky is the ugliest girl in the world. And here she is!"
A large curtain was cast aside, and the girl named Becky appeared. She was hardly visible at first, but when she trudged up the steps to the podium, her features became evident. The crowd gasped. There were cries of "Ain't she ugly?" and "A freak of nature, and no mistake!" Punky tried to peer around the bodies which were obscuring her view, but she couldn't see much.
"D'ya know what?" shouted Vinny. "We have our very own freak here in Dangerville. We call her Punky. Come here, Punky!"
He turned, and the crowd dispersed, allowing him to seize Punky and drag her to the front. She struggled, but Vinny was too strong. The fat man was amazed as Vinny thrust her face forward until she was directly in front of Becky. Then their eyes met.
Punky couldn't believe it. Over a thousand times she had observed herself before a mirror, gazing at her own reflection, wishing for something beautiful instead of the monstrosity the Lord had given her. Looking at the girl's twisted features was like staring into that mirror. Becky was repulsive. They both were repulsive.
"How about that then?" said Vinny. "Two retards together! You've found your long lost twin, Punky, you shit-for-brains bubblehead!"
Punky was almost in tears. If only Daddy would show up, she thought. She glanced around, half-expecting him to appear. She would forgive all his sins, all the times he had been bad to her over the years, if he would just show his face. There was no sign of him. She rushed from the tent, shoving her way through the crowd. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. She carried on, as fast as she could, but Vinny and his mates were chasing, calling out to her.
"Airhead! Retard! Shit for brains!"
She raced all the way home, attempting to ignore the catcalls. Her heart was pounding as she burst through the kitchen door and ran into the sitting room.
"Daddy, Daddy, they're chasing me!" she cried.
Daddy was in the armchair, wearing a red shirt, although it hadn't been that colour when he had put it on that morning. The kitchen knife was sticking into his throat, just where Punky had left it.